In that silence, there are echoes of what the argument is about, how it started, how you are feeling, but most important, you listen. Silence is also really useful when you and your partner are fighting It forces you to get to know each other a little bit better (or think the other person is very strange it can go either way). This is what makes it a useful tool in a relationship. I’m betting that either something completely random came out of your mouth, you repeated something, or you changed the subject to something different.
Think about the last time you felt this pressure to say something.
It prompts the client to say something more about what they were talking about. Silence is NOT a bad thingĬounselors know that silence is a hugely beneficial tool in the counseling process and to be patient with it. Now that you’ve done that, can we all agree how uncomfortable you were doing this?ĭid you feel that tension in your body? How about that yearning to look literally anywhere else but back at your partner? That feeling is the same feeling you get when there is silence between you and a stranger, friend, family member, or even your partner when there is lengthy silence between you, and you realize it. I want you to look at your partner in the eyes and maintain eye contact for three minutes.
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